Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Prompt Week 2 REDONE- EDITED

"Want to try something really, really bad?" Of course my intriguing mind couldn't resist. "Sure" I said with a slick smile. She pulled out a small baggie that had bits of green in it. I knew what it was, I wasn't stupid, I just had never seen it before and she could tell by the shocked look in my eye. "It's alright, it isn't as bad as some people say." Her reassuring words eased my mind. She packed some of the green bits into a small, glass pipe that was engraved with swirls and patterns of all different colors. "Is this going to hurt?" I asked out of fright.
"Of course not. Well, it might burn on the way down but you'll get over it." Well, if she said so I guess she had to be right. When she had finished packing the green substance into the swirly, majestic looking structure I felt a twinge of nervousness in my stomach. "It's alright. I'll show you how then you can have a turn."
"Okay." I said wearily. As she brought the pipe to her lips she lit the lighter and I could see smoke billowing out around her mouth. She made a squinted up face for about 5 seconds and then coughed out a big cloud of smoke. "You're turn." She said with a smile.
"I need help!"
"Just hold your finger on this hole and when I say suck, suck the smoke into your lungs as much as you can and no matter how bad it burns, don't let it out!" I put my lips to the pipe just as she had done. As the lighter lit I hear her yell "Suck!" So I did just that. Just as soon as I started to suck I broke out into a coughing fit like I've never experienced. I let my lips off the pipe and hacked out a huge cloud of smoke. This coughing continued for about 5 minutes. Just as soon as I could catch my breath she had stopped laughing. "That was hilarious. Ready for some more?"

This is prompt number 8

1 comment:

  1. Whoa, whoa! You give us all the buildup and then deny the reader the high??? That's audience abuse!

    You can't end a piece "That was a day I will never forget on that hot Georgia afternoon." That's where you should have begun! Try a rewrite that starts with that very sentence--or at least starts, ""Want to try something really, really bad?" Of course my intriguing mind couldn't resist. "Sure" I said with a slick smile."

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